The Psycho Ex-Girlfriend Thread

[Mogura]

Post your real-life psycho ex-girlfriend stories here (psycho ex-boyfriend stories welcome, too). Perhaps we could do a prize for the most-fucked up story.

*If you've never had an ex-girlfriend go psycho on you, you're really missing out on one of life's true pleasures. /sarcasm

[Raelene]

First!

I was the psycho ex a few years back. My boyfriend broke up with me on the grounds that his parents would never accept our union. I found out through mutual friends that he moved a new, much younger girlfriend into his home within a week of our breakup.

I contacted him and whined that I'd left a lot of personal stuff there, which was true. I whined so much that he agreed to let me into his home just one last time to pick it all up, on the grounds that I was in and out of there within half an hour, and that I'd never let his new girlfriend find out that I'd been there.

As soon as I got in, I moved into action. In the bedroom, I put empty condom packets under his blanket. In the bathroom, I put a pair of my earrings behind a jar of her cold cream. And in the kitchen, I left a hair clip next to a sponge.

A couple of weeks later, I heard on the grapevine that he'd been dumped, after a blazing row. I never found out the reason why, though.

Hell hath no fury!

[Langslave]

Nice work Raelene

[BergKatse]

Well, I think that concludes this thread...

[steki47]

Nah, it ain't over. Hasn't even started.

My first psycho exGF:
-Burned or cut up most of the presents I bought for me. The usual pattern being that we would have an argument a week or two after her birthday, etc. and her response was to destroy the things I gave her.
-Destroyed baby pictures of me my parents sent.
-Burned autographed books I had of my favorite authors.
-Tried to stab me with scissors
-Swing bottles at my head a few times.

After we broke up and I left for the navy, she got deep into drugs and left her 3-year old child alone for days at a time. He accidentally started a fire that nearly burned down her dad's house. Child Protective Services took the kid away for awhile and she got him back.

When her son was 16, he ran away and went into foster care. He was adopted by a wonderful man. The child requested a no contact order towards his mother. I visited him last year and rekindled an old relationship. He's really an amazing young man who deserves better than her.

She inherited $100K from her father (sale of house). She bought a $25K car for her new BF. They had an argument and she went outisde and torched the car.

For twenty years she spoke of starting a clothing boutique. Never did.

My last contact with her via email had her claiming that I was a danger to her son and weak for leaving the relationship.

I skipped a few details, such as her suicide attempt, Prozac, etc.

[Mogura]

First!

I was the psycho ex a few years back. My boyfriend broke up with me on the grounds that his parents would never accept our union. I found out through mutual friends that he moved a new, much younger girlfriend into his home within a week of our breakup.

I contacted him and whined that I'd left a lot of personal stuff there, which was true. I whined so much that he agreed to let me into his home just one last time to pick it all up, on the grounds that I was in and out of there within half an hour, and that I'd never let his new girlfriend find out that I'd been there.

As soon as I got in, I moved into action. In the bedroom, I put empty condom packets under his blanket. In the bathroom, I put a pair of my earrings behind a jar of her cold cream. And in the kitchen, I left a hair clip next to a sponge.

A couple of weeks later, I heard on the grapevine that he'd been dumped, after a blazing row. I never found out the reason why, though.

Hell hath no fury!

7/10. While you made good use of your skills in social engineering and employed the classic passive-aggressive attack, I feel you could have turned the heat up with the clever placement of anal beads.

[Mogura]

Nah, it ain't over. Hasn't even started.

My first psycho exGF:
-Burned or cut up most of the presents I bought for me. The usual pattern being that we would have an argument a week or two after her birthday, etc. and her response was to destroy the things I gave her.
-Destroyed baby pictures of me my parents sent.
-Burned autographed books I had of my favorite authors.
-Tried to stab me with scissors
-Swing bottles at my head a few times.

After we broke up and I left for the navy, she got deep into drugs and left her 3-year old child alone for days at a time. He accidentally started a fire that nearly burned down her dad's house. Child Protective Services took the kid away for awhile and she got him back.

When her son was 16, he ran away and went into foster care. He was adopted by a wonderful man. The child requested a no contact order towards his mother. I visited him last year and rekindled an old relationship. He's really an amazing young man who deserves better than her.

She inherited $100K from her father (sale of house). She bought a $25K car for her new BF. They had an argument and she went outisde and torched the car.

For twenty years she spoke of starting a clothing boutique. Never did.

My last contact with her via email had her claiming that I was a danger to her son and weak for leaving the relationship.

I skipped a few details, such as her suicide attempt, Prozac, etc.

7/10. She sounds like a bona-fide psycho, as opposed to chick with a low EQ dealing with the whole "When life gives you lemons" thing. I'm afraid to ask how long you were together.

[allblacks]

How about the Mogurator stops grading people and starts contributing?

Just having a joke!

I think I have posted this one elsewhere but a friend of mine had a really wonderful ex-wife. First she cheated on him in front of their friends at an outdoor picnic in a park. YES SEX in front of friends in public. And then she followed the guy she cheated with to Aussie somewhere. After that ended badly she commanded my friend to allow her to try to fix their problems by making him bring their son back to Japan. (Yes this was a case of a father forcibly removing child from abusive mother and evacuating to NZ.) After all was said and done her parents condoned her behaviour as well.

The last I heard my friend was in a similar relationship in NZ with another Japanese girl.

[Mogura]

How about the Mogurator stops grading people and starts contributing?

Ha ha! If only! Truth be told, I never had any chicks go psycho on me upon going our separate ways. Not to say that I didn't date a few nut-jobs or have my share of stalkers.

[steki47]

I'm afraid to ask how long you were together.

About three years. There was a gap of 15 years and we had some communication via FB. Then her craziness popped up and so I cut her off. Her son and I talk a bunch.

[allblacks]

Didnt you also have one like her in Japan? Just asking!

[steki47]

Didnt you also have one like her in Japan? Just asking!

Yes, just haven't posted about her yet. The personality similarities are uncanny. Maybe it's me...

[Mogura]

Didnt you also have one like her in Japan? Just asking!

Yes, just haven't posted about her yet. The personality similarities are uncanny. Maybe it's me...

You're not the only one afflicted with the "Save the damaged princess" syndrome...

[steki47]

You're not the only one afflicted with the "Save the damaged princess" syndrome...

True, I heard roughly the same story with other people.

Funny thing, my longest relationship was with a woman who tried to rescue a creepy alcoholic guy. After a hideous and short marriage, she came out rather scarred emotionally. While we dated, we both appreciated the general sense of responsibility and level-headedness we saw in each other.

Then, she started to complain I was "weak" and "boring". After we broke up, she went through a string of short-term relationships and heavy boozing. I mentioned last week that she got beat up a couple times in bar fights in LA. I suppose that's the "strength" and "excitement" she was looking for.

I heard she eventually smartened up and re-married and is doing well in San Diego. My other two ex-GFs are still boiling in their own loser juices.

Back to the OT. In many cases, the "damage" is self-inflicted and you can't save people from themselves. Those sorts have a knack for self-destruction and don't mind dragging others down with them.

"That which does not kill me makes a great post on Let's Japan!"

[steki47]

OK, the Japanese ex. Time for her story.

At first, she presented an attractive package. She had traveled the world, lived in Oz for 6 years, spoke English and had some ambitions of starting her own business to follow in her father's footsteps.

Gradually, I began to see behind the mask. She'd work at a job for 6-12 months and then suddenly quit due to "stress". She'd spend a year or so doing absolutely nothing-sleeping until noon, doing laundry with her mother.

She had a childlike habit of saying whatever was on her mind without realizing the consequences.

"If you break my heart, my father will kill you."
"I was very nice and obedient to my ex-BFs. I'm not like that with you."
"If you don't become rich, I'll marry someone else." (I replied, "Go ahead. Good luck.")
"You're very lazy." (I left one dirty coffee cup in the sink. That I worked 6 days a week and she had no job didn't matter.)

Got angry when I disagreed with the incorrect advice she gave me about the Kintetsu schedules. I traveled up and down the Mie prefecture at Nova but she knew better. ( "I'm Japanese, you need to listen to me.")

During our relationship, she did absolutely nothing to start a business or better herself in anyway. I started two businesses, learned Japanese, got promoted twice at Nova and got a black belt.

When we had a disagreement, she would translate everything into Japanese for the folks at our dojo so they could laugh at the "silly foreigner". When the older men in the dojo called her fat, ugly and old, she would come crying to me about how the cruelty of Japanese men and society.

The last straw was when she and her mother told me that I was not allowed to visit my family in the US. My mother had just had a heart attack, but that didn't matter to her.

I eventually decided enough was enough and secretly bought a ticket back to the US. And vanished from her life.

[Raelene]

7/10. While you made good use of your skills in social engineering and employed the classic passive-aggressive attack, I feel you could have turned the heat up with the clever placement of anal beads.

I had to google the bead thing. I wish I hadn't now.

[Raelene]

They had an argument and she went outside and torched the car.

Well, that puts me out of the running, then. I couldn't torch a marshmallow, let alone a car.

[steki47]

They had an argument and she went outside and torched the car.

Well, that puts me out of the running, then. I couldn't torch a marshmallow, let alone a car.

As I was sneaking out of the apartment, I thought about taking a shit on the floor. Decided against it. Heck, I thought about making a pile of her clothes and torching them.

That would make me a psycho ex-BF. And I had some vague notions about returning to Japan.

[Langslave]

A few prawns inside the curtain rods Or, an ex-Nova mate and his pals were playing "Hide The Turd" back in uni, came one guys turn, off he went while the others waited outside. He came out, they went in to search, no luck. Few days later one of them was buttering his toast at breakfast...the butter was suddenly brown...

[steki47]

Nice advice with the prawns. I used to prefer more direct and obviously hostile gestures.

In the navy, we had a "Phantom Shitter" on our ship. Every so often, you'd find a dump in some part of the ship. In the middle of a hallway, a . Another one was sprayed across the helicopter landing. That required the fellow to climb up to the next deck and hang off the rails backwards.

[Langslave]

'Gotta have a hobby to keep ya' from going crazy, he was probably the quietest guy on board.

[wilde_oscar]

Nice advice with the prawns. I used to prefer more direct and obviously hostile gestures.

In the navy, we had a "Phantom Shitter" on our ship. Every so often, you'd find a dump in some part of the ship. In the middle of a hallway, a . Another one was sprayed across the helicopter landing. That required the fellow to climb up to the next deck and hang off the rails backwards.

We had one of those in the (Australian) Army and I remember some time ago that Senseiman told a similar story about a phantom shitter in the Canadian Army. This suggests two possibilities:

1. Every military establishment is issued a phantom shitter. That is, there is someone on the books who is nominated to be the new PS every time to previous incumbent is transferred/retires/steps on a mine/whatever. This is a secret society which makes the Illuminati/Mafia/Rosicrucians look tame by comparison, hence none has ever confessed or been unmasked. Rumour has it that a successful stint as a PS can augment a serviceperson's career. This explains a lot about some of the decisions made by senior general/admirals/air force marshals (or whatever they're called).

2. Every military establishment is haunted by a spectral phantom shitter that can only affect the material world through the placement of faeces.

[steki47]

Going back to the OT, I can see a pattern of behavior with my exes as well as some of my former co-workers (like the Nova teachers I mentioned previously). They live completely in a bubble of their own creation and seem angry that the rest of humanity doesn't obey them. A total vacuum of responsibility in which they are unconcerned or unaware of how their behavior affects others. Talking to them does no good. Best just to walk away as I did. Life is too short.

[katamari]

i ran away to japan to escape a crazy ex. on reflection, probably a bit of a drastic step.

[steki47]

i ran away to japan to escape a crazy ex. on reflection, probably a bit of a drastic step.

Out of the fire...

[senseiman]

Raelene - best revenge story I have heard in years. Well done!

WO - Plausible theory there. Our PS specialized in crapping in the dryer. Well, he only did it once so I guess it wasn`t a specialty. Terrible place to do it though, in addition to ruining some poor guy`s combats it also left a brutal stench that stunk up the entire section of the barracks.

Strange how reflecting on stuff like that somehow makes me miss the army...

[Lamarr]

A few prawns inside the curtain rods Or, an ex-Nova mate and his pals were playing "Hide The Turd" back in uni, came one guys turn, off he went while the others waited outside. He came out, they went in to search, no luck. Few days later one of them was buttering his toast at breakfast...the butter was suddenly brown...

I've heard that story before, it's one of those "urban myths". Like the other classic, about someone eating a curry at a restaurant somewhere, feels really ill afterwards and starts throwing up, goes to hospital thinking it's food poisoning, they check the vomit and find 12 different kinds of spunk in there, because the chefs were all masturbating into the curry pot.

Or the guy whose parents went away for the weekend, he invites his girlfriend over and they shag on the sofa, but she loses control and shits herself. The guy tells the parents that it was the dog. He comes home the next day and they've had the dog put down.

More interesting urban myths and their origins here: http://www.snopes.com/

[MacGyver]

Psyscho exs, I've had a couple of those. To cherry pick in no particular order:
Pricked holes in all my condoms after we broke up.
I planned to spend the night at a mate's place but got a text late that night saying come home cause I'm sick (cold) and need you to look after me. Decided not to (she just wanted to control me) and then next day when I got home she threw furniture, amongst other things, at me because I didn't come home when she asked me to.
Had my suspicions she was cheating and then found out for sure one morning before work. She calls me at work mid-afternoon and just says "Goodbye" with a peculiar laugh and hangs up. I leave work a little early to go home to check up on her as the phone call made me worry to find her passed out in the kitchen with a few beer cans and tablets of some sort scattered all over the floor. Thought she had tried to kill herself but it was (of course) an attempt to make me worry about her and not leave her (didn't work).
Would threaten to knife me in my sleep.
During arguments she would get a cutting knife and threaten to stab me.
We had a couple of "rest" periods when we lived together (basically just her living with her folks for a couple of weeks) and during one of them she came over unannounced in the middle of the night (3/4amish) but I didn't hear the doorbell (weeknight so I was dead to the word, funnily enough ) so she just lay outside the front door waiting for me to wake up/go to work and find her, which I did when the door was heavy.
Came home one night to find her passed out (she'd been drinking) in the genkan/hall waiting for me to get home. When I woke her up, she grabbed onto my leg and wouldn't let go.

No doubt there are more but I can't think of them at the minute. There is one but it can't be told on a family website such as this....

Perhaps not all her behaviour was psychotic but a lot of it was certainly strange. When she finally got her shit out of my place (must've been close to a year after we broke up) that I had boxed up, I was tempted to leave a couple of "surprises" for her, but this payback/revenge crap is BS and I'd like to think I'm above it (that doesn't mean I haven't thought about it! ). Plus I just like to have a clean break (although this was far from clean unfortunately) and move on.